The Housing Bubble

Yo yo yo here i go
Greenspan is at hand, for making this mess that no one understands. While Japan unloads US assets at hand. Yield Curve inversion is a perversion to all the flippers and the HELOC dippers. M3 is being tossed to the sea, while they print off money from Bernanke. The ARMS will adjust , the bubble will bust, as we look at our worthless money and say “in god we trust”?????

The Bubble Rap, part I, Yah, uh-huh
flippers turn to trippers, in a world they didn’t want to understand
for them the popping of the bubble means doomsday is at hand
lying realtors telling suckers the price would never go down
now telling sellers to drop their price, with a lack of comission frown
they went from interest only to no home, homey
doh, I shoulda listend to the good people on the blog
they wanted to help, and they didn’t even know me.

Mary, Mary quite contrary
sold her house
moved to the prairie (and rented)

Based on “As I Was Going To St. Ives”:

As I was going to Silly Valley,

I met a man buying seven houses.

Each house cost 7 I/Os,

Each I/O cost points,

Each point cost thousands of dollars.

Houses, I/Os, points, and dollars,

How many houses does the man have in Silly Valley?

(None. He lost all but 1…the house he lives in, and he’s renting that back from the new owner….because he could not flip them as planned.)

BayQT~

Start-a-loan, start-a-loan, RE man,
Sell me a house as fast as you can;
Buy it and flip it and mark it with an F(oreclosure),
and put it on the market for mommy and me.

The Bubble Wrap Part I
Yah uh-huh!
Flippers turn to trippers in a world they didn’t want to understand.
Bursting of the bubble, doomdsay is at hand.
Real Estate Agents telling suckers the price will never go down.
Now telling sellers to drop their price with a lack of commision frown.
They went from interest only, to no home, homey.
I shoulda listened to the good old bloggers
wanted to help and didn’t even know me.

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe…..
Because the house was forclosed when the I/O and HELOCs came due…

Oh, the brave old chairman of the Fed,
he had ten thousand Yen.
He marched them up to the top of the hill,
And he marched them down again.
And when they were up they were up,
And when they were down they were down,
And when they were only half way up,
he was a hero and not a clown.

This is one TALENTED bunch of folks, you can always get a part time job doing this stuff:):)

thunder roared
lightning flashed
the rates went up
the market crashed

It’s a world of Helocs, a world of fees,
It’s a world of ARMS, and a world of sleeze,
There’s so much that we fear, we might lose it this year,
It’s a bubble after all!

Baby Got HOUSE!

(Sung to the tune of “Baby Got Back!”)

[Intro]
Oh, my, god. Becky, look at her house.
It is so big, *scoff*. It looks like,
one of those RE guys’ houses.
But, y’know, who understands those RE guys? *scoff*
They only talk to you, because,
it looks like a total McMansion, ‘kay?
I mean, her house, is just so big. *scoff*
I can’t believe it’s just so HUGE, it’s like,
out there, I mean - gross. Look!
She’s just so … B-I-G!

[Sir Sell-a-Lot]
I like big houses and I can not lie
You other flippers can’t deny
That when a seller walks in with that look
And a flyer in your face
You get sprung, wanna pull out your tongue
‘Cause you notice that house was stuffed
Deep in the rooms it’s sportin’
I’m hooked and I can’t stop staring
Oh baby, I wanna get wit’cha
And take your picture
My RE buddies tried to warn me
But with that house you got makes me feel so horny
Ooh, super smooth doorknobs
You say you wanna get in my Benz?
Well, use me, use me
‘Cause you ain’t that average seller
I’ve seen them dancin’
The hell with romancin’
Let’s get it, get it…
Got it goin’ like a turbo ‘Vette
I’m tired of house magazines
Sayin’ small condos are the thing
Take the average buyer and ask him that
It’s gotta pack much square footage
So, fellas! (Yeah!) Fellas! (Yeah!)
Has your seller got the house? (Hell yeah!)
Tell ‘em to sell it! (Sell it!) Sell it! (Sell it!)
Sell that big ole house!
Baby got HOUSE!

ROFL!!

BayQT~

Here is one from Eminem’s Kim…. I’m not a big fan of his.. but in this song he’s all normal and then just goes ballsitic when he gets pissed off.. And there isn’t much of a rhyme LOL. THe song doesn’t have much of a rhyme to it either.

Eminem

Aww look at daddy’s new home
That’s daddy baby
Beautiful precious house
Yesterday I financed you
Used an ARM to buy you.
How did the payment get so big?
Can’t believe it now
your double what I paid
My home you’re so precious
But the rate is killing me
Go back down b%^ch
If you move again I’ll beat the sh*t out of you

Welcome to housing California
…
You can list it any time you like
But you can never sell

HEY!

If anyone is on AIM or AOL, you can IM me at MrHousingBubble

Hit me up, and let’s chat, I’m not going anywhere tonight!

You put your payment in
You pull some equity out
You crank that 10K stereo up
and you shake it all about

You do the Hokey-Pocus
and you flaunt it all about.
That’s what it’s all about!

You put a HELOC app in
You pull an Escalade out
You take a 3 week cruise
and all of it’s on the house!

You do the Hokey-Pocus
and order a home theater while you’re out.
That’s what it’s all about!

You pull your Cayenne in
and empty your mailbox out
Higher payments have kicked in
on those rates you heard about

You do the Hokey-Pocus
and another refi to bail you out.
20% appreciation forever, without a doubt!

You put your 401k in
The developer is pulling out.
No renters want to move in
for what you’re shelling out.

You do the Hokey-Pocus
but forclosure sharks are still circling around.
How’d this come about??

close and rent,
or rent your clothes

(you know……rent, as in tear asunder)

The Owl and the Pussycat bought a home, in a pricy new tract far from town,
They had no money and thought that was funny, that their lender said “no money down”,

So they moved right in and started to grin, at how cleaver they had become,
But after a year they started to fear, their investment was looking quite dumb.

They were upside down, like all in their town,
And their lender was screaming quite loud,
“List it today, your things carry away”.
NEVER AGAIN they so vowed!

Dum, dum, dum, honey what have you done
Dum, dum, dum, it’s the flippers havin’ fun
Dum, dum, dum, honey what have you done
Dum, dum, dum, it’s the sound, it’s the sound…
Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah….

Janie’s Got A REIT
Janie’s Got A REIT
Her whole world’s gone to sheet
She got her feet set in concrete
What did her realtor do
What did he put her through

They say when Janie was arrested
They found him underneath a train
But man, he had it comin’
Now that Janie’s Got A REIT
She ain’t never gonna be complete

Janie’s REIT come undone
Janie’s REIT come undone
Her dog day’s just begun
Now everybody is on the run
Tell her now it’s untrue
What did her realtor do

He jacked the little bitty baby
The man has got to be insane
They say the spell that he was under
The lightnin’ and the thunder
Knew that someone had to stop the pain

Run away, run away from the pain
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Run away, run away from the pain
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Run away, run away, run, run away

Janie’s REIT come undone
Janie’s REIT come undone
Her dog day’s just begun
Now everybody is on the run
What did her realtor do
It’s Janie’s last I.O.U.

She had to take him down easy
And put a bullet in his brain
She said ’cause nobody believes me
The man was such a sleeze
He ain’t never gonna be the same

Run away, run away from the pain
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Run away, run away from the pain
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Run away, run away, run, run away

Janie’s REIT come undone
Janie’s REIT come undone
Janie’s REIT come undone
Everybody is on the run

Janie’s REIT come undone
Her dog day’s just begun
Now everybody’s on the run (Honey, honey what’s your problem)
‘Cause Janie’s Janie’s REIT come undone (Tell me it ain’t right)
Janie’s REIT come undone (Was it HELOC equity robbin’)
Her dog day’s just begun (That made you scream at night)
Janie’s REIT come undone
Her dog day’s just begun
Now everybody’s on the run
Janie’s REIT come undone

OC real estate, you can’t beat it!!! Buy the biggest, most expensive, and outrageous property you can find because this is more than just a place to live … at 30% yoy appreciation, this is …

“INCOME PROPERTY” THE OC WAY
You don’t need no stink’n job.
Your Ferrari’s only a refi away.
Don’t be no chump … just jump.
Hurray! Hurray!
Your Ferrari’s on its way!

There’s no time for us
There’s no place for us
What is this thing that builds our dreams yet slips away
From us

Who wants to rent forever
Who wants to rent forever….?

There’s no chance for us
It’s all decided for us
This world has only one sweet moment set aside for us

Who wants to rent forever
Who wants to rent forever?

Who dares to refi forever?
When love must die

But touch my tears with your lips
Touch my world with your fingertips
And we can HELOC forever
And we can I/O forever
Forever is our today
Who wants to live forever
Who wants to live forever?
Forever is our today

Who waits forever anyway?

Then there’s THE ROLLING STONES lyrics - “19th Nervous Breakdown”
(Jagger/Richards) about the market crash and depression. Everyone here does know that Jagger has a degree in economics right?

bob marley “I shot the sheriff”

He bought a condo, but he did not get no equity.
He bought a condo, but he did not get no equity.

All around in my home town
They want no money down.
They say they want to give me some equity
they say that its all free,
You must buy into REeeeee.
But I say:

If you buy a condo, you will file bankruptcy.
If you buy a condo, you will file bankruptcy.

Well, it’s not exactly a nursery rhyme, but here goes :).

Yesterday,
All my troubles seemed so far away
Now it looks as though they’re here to stay
Oh, I believe in Yesterday

Suddenly,
There’s no refi’s like there used to be
And the taxes are just killing me
Oh, Yesterday, Came Suddenly

I went Neg. I/O
Well you know
It’s less to pay
I felt rich and strong
Now I long for Yesterday

Yesterday
Wealth from flipping was the easy way
Now it looks as if I’ll go BK
Oh, I believe in Yesterday

I went Neg. I/O
Well you know
It’s less to pay
I felt rich and strong
Now I long for Yesterday…

Mmmm Mmmm Mmmmm Mmmm Mmm Mm Mm

Itsy bitsy flipper tried
to climb the property ladder

Down went the comps
which made him even madder.

Out came the sign throwers
but it was all in vain.

Prices for the month
had retreated once again.

For each home that sold
Sellers demanded more gold
The buyers flocked like lemmings
and the lenders provided
ever more gold
to satisfy ever growing greed
until one day,
fewer and fewer sold
and more sat around and
collected mold.

Remember the Devo song “Snowball”?
Well, here’s a little variation…

my agent took our house
and then she listed it
she priced it weigh too high
like a house of gold
like some castles sold
until it sat too long
until she lost control
and the price dropped down
and the price dropped down
and the price dropped down
and the price dropped down
she took a tiny break
waited for Spring to break
changed the listing date
but still no one to take
she had to pull the house
i saw a money pit
my agent turned around
let’s try again
let’s try again
let’s try again
let’s try again
footpaths made for walkin’
kitchens made for cookin’
garages made for parkin’
basements made for storin’
driveways made for drivin’
homes were made for livin’
now what am I gonna do?
two homes
in my name
two bills
must be paid
my heart broke
when my agent failed
two homes forclosed

Remember when houses were going sky-high
And no one really wondered why
Didn’t have a care in the world
With Alan Greenspan standing by
When happily ever after fails
And we’ve been poisoned by these fairy tales
The lawyers dwell on small details
Since daddy had to fly
There’s no place where we can go
That’s still untouched by man
We sit and watch the trucks roll by
As they take our Hummers with a grin

You can lay your head back on the ground
And let your hair fall all around me
Offer up your best defense
But this is the end
This is the end of the innocence

O’ beautiful, for spacious skies
But now those skies are threatening
They’re beating plowshares into swords
For this cowboy that we elected king
Speculators often fail
When poisoned by these fairy tales
The lawyers clean up all details
Since daddy had to lie
There’s no place where we can go
And wash away this sin
We sit and watch the trucks roll by
As they take our Hummers with a grin

Just lay your head back on the ground
And let your hair spill all around me
Offer up your best defense
But this is the end
This is the end of the innocence

Who knows how long this will last
Now we’ve come so far, so fast
But, somewhere back there in the dust
That same small town in each of us
I need to remember this
So baby give me just one kiss
And let me take a long last look
Before we say good bye

Just lay your head back on the ground
And let your hair fall all around me
Offer up your best defense
But this is the end
This is the end of the innocence

Jack and Jill
bought up the hill
before they were priced out forever.

With nothing down
and homes increasing in town
They thought themselves quite clever.

But as the market tumbled
their shack’s equity crumbled
and the commute became a chore.

Both of them dream of
some sort of scheme
but they’re stuck there for many years more.

(To the tune of Dire Straits’ Money for Nothin’)
That ain’t workin’, that’s the way you do it,
You flip the house, like on Home TV,
That ain’t workin’, that’s the way you do it,
Money for nothin’ and your bricks for free.

99 condo signs on the wall, 99 condo signs,
Another flipper goes down,with a big frown,
100 condo signs on the wall.

Wow, the rain must have kept people indoors all weekend

…with apologies to the Gloved One…

Real Estate Thrilla’

It’s close to midnight and something evil’s lurking in the dark
Under the moonlight you see a sight that almost stops your heart
You try to scream but price drops take the profit before you make it
You start to freeze as horror looks you right between the eyes,
You’re paralyzed

‘Cause this is housing crash, housing crash time
And no one’s gonna save you from the beast about strike
You know it’s housing crash, housing crash time
You’re fighting for your life, ’cause you’re upside down tonight

You hear the door slam and realize there’s nowhere left to run
You feel the cold hand and wonder if you’ll ever see the sun
You close your eyes and hope that this is just imagination
But you hear depreciation creepin’ up behind
You’re out of time

They’re out to get you, there’s bankers closing in on every side
They will re-possess you, unless the buyer signs on the dotted line
Now is the time for you and I to cuddle close together
All thru the night I’ll save you from the terror on the streets,
I’ll make you see

(In the video, we will replace dancing zombies with desperate newbie RE agents. And instead of Mr. Vincent Price, we’ll have Mr. “New Price”)

I once met a Realtor named Trevor
Who said I’d be priced out forever
I took his advice
even paid thrice the price
Didn’t I feel smug and clever!

Then I heard talk of a Bubble
Began to think I was in Trouble
Tried vainly to sell
And now I’m in hell
Bartender make that a Double!

Alan Greenspan sat on a wall
Then the economy had a great fall
W Bush, John Snow and even that Ben
Couldn’t keep housing from crashing again.

This real estate market is really cursed
It won’t be long till it finally bursts.

The lending institutions have created a mess
But you know those dudes will never confess.

Interest only loans that start so low
Let’s just sit back and watch them grow.

People refinancing their homes left and right
New cars, vacations, …it’s out of sight!

We’re living on credit that we later must pay
Wake up people, these times won’t stay!

Only got one set of lyrics that apply to the current situation on this board.

If you don’t know the music of TOOL…

Go buy them.

T-O-O-L.

From Aenima, and the song ‘Aenima’…

“Ænema”

Some say the end is near.
Some say we’ll see armageddon soon.
I certainly hope we will.
I sure could use a vacation from this…

…Bullshit three ring circus sideshow of
Freaks

Here in this hopeless fucking hole we call LA

The only way to fix it is to flush it all away.
Any fucking time. Any fucking day.

Learn to swim, I’ll see you down in Arizona bay.

Fret for your figure and
Fret for your latte and
Fret for your hairpiece and
ret for your lawsuit and
Fret for your prozac and
Fret for your pilot and
Fret for your contract and
Fret for your car.

It’s a
Bullshit three ring circus sideshow of
Freaks

Here in this hopeless fucking hole we call LA

The only way to fix it is to flush it all away.
Any fucking time. Any fucking day.

Learn to swim, I’ll see you down in Arizona bay.

Some say a comet will fall from the sky…

…Followed by meteor showers and tidal waves…
Followed by faultlines that cannot sit still.
Followed by millions of dumbfounded dipshits.

Some say the end is near.
Some say we’ll see armageddon soon.
I certainly hope we will cuz-
I sure could use a vacation from this-

Silly shit, stupid shit…

One great big festering neon distraction,
I’ve a suggestion to keep you all occupied.

(Learn to swim.)

Mom’s gonna fix it all soon.
Mom’s comin’ round to put it back the way it ought to be.

(Learn to swim.)

Fuck L Ron Hubbard and
Fuck all his clones.
Fuck all those gun-toting
Hip gangster wannabes.

(Learn to swim.)

Fuck retro anything.
Fuck your tattoos.
Fuck all you junkies and
Fuck your short memory.

(Learn to swim.)

Fuck smiley glad-hands
With hidden agendas.
Fuck these dysfunctional,
Insecure actresses.

(Learn to swim.)

Cuz I’m praying for rain
And I’m praying for tidal waves
I wanna see the ground give way.

I wanna watch it all go down.

Mom please flush it all away.

I wanna watch it go right in and down.

I wanna watch it go right in.

Watch you flush it all away.

Time to bring it down again.
Don’t just call me pessimist.
Try and read between the lines.

I can’t imagine why you wouldn’t
Welcome any change, my friend.

I wanna see it all come down.
Suck it down.
Flush it down.

__________________________________________

No, TOOL doesn’t crave the destruction and death of thousands of people.

Much of what they say is ‘Satire’.

‘Satire’ is a higher form of communication, that takes deliberation and education to understand.

On the surface, much ‘Satire’, such as ‘American Psycho’ or ‘Fight Club’ seems disturbing and violent.

Under the surface, with much studying, you’ll find there is much, much more going on.

Yes, you have to buy the album and ‘read between the lines’.

Interesting music, just like Mozart, is not meant to be easy.

That’s why it lasts.

TOOL will be headlining this year’s Coachella event in Palm Springs on April 30th.

See you there…

When 18,000 homes are on sale in Orange County, California…

PICTURE WINDOW

Picture window but eyes glazed over
Big back yard is growing over
Neighbors envy getting slower

Tract by tract are getting ravaged
The American Dream now getting savaged
Sacrifice must have its yield
Future scars will be concealed

I just got mine; you’ve all had yours
My family and friend concurs
I lost them all when just a renter
Now I’m back within their center

Picture window but eyes glazed over
We can see the vultures hover
Finally won but didn’t win
Not sure if we’ll begin again

Closed the blinds on picture window
Saves on heat and air conditioning
Like we use them, wishful thinking
Late to the party and hardly blinking

Went in blind and took advice
Stuff to last entire life
Never thought, nor did the wife
Came to the party much too late
And now we have to face our fate